Our daughter left for University :(

Tags

children, postaday2014, university

My husband and I dropped our daughter off at the airport very early this morning so that she can resume her studies at school, she is a junior this year. We are both sad, happy for our daughter, but sad for ourselves. We love having our children at home, we know that they need to leave the nest, but we like having them nearby, they are both very funny and engaging.

I know that our daughter is going to have a great semester and is getting closer to getting a firm grasp of what she wants to do with her life as she gets older. She is a very responsible young lady as is our son. Whatever path they choose for themselves, I am sure that they will give it their all and they will be successful. My husband and I will be on the sidelines, in the background, wherever they want us to be, cheering them on and supporting them however they need us to and loving them unconditionally in the process.

I still miss her.

Our wonderful time together as a family

Tags

baby girl, comfortable, Miami, postaday2013, university, weekend

Today we had such a nice time together walking around downtown Miami and we stumbled upon a French Bistro called La Bastille. We actually found it at the perfect time, it was time for brunch. We were seated immediately inside, the Bistro isn’t big and it had seating outside but I felt that it was too hot to seat out there and eat. The servers were all women and one of them had their daughter “working” as well, she had to be about five years old and she had a child size waiter’s apron and she had her own pad and pencil to write with, it was precious. The brunch menu was very appetizing, they had pain au chocolat, croissants and a French breakfast with cafe au lait, they also had eggs Benedict served on a croissant instead of the traditional english muffin, my hubby and the baby girl ordered eggs Benedict which the baby girl ordered hers with smoked salmon as an extra, I ordered the French breakfast because I was hankering for real French bread and preserves, it was delicious and brought me back to France. I am definitely hoping for an encore tomorrow morning.

We then spent the rest of the day going to stores to replenish the baby girl’s wardrobe, she was in need of some more tops. She brought us to a very nice shopping mall not far from the campus and I was very proud of her for making us walk, because I know first hand that walking isn’t her favorite thing and she was having us do something that she has gotten to accept as a good way to get in exercise. At one point we got back to her campus to drop off her things at her dorm room and we got to see a Maman duck with her flock of ducklings, they were adorable.

We said our good byes, I felt immediately sad, but I feel a million times better now, I have seen how comfortable she is in her new environment, she had a spontaneous smile on her face at all times and she burst out laughing so easily this weekend. She is doing great in her mind, at her school and all around. I can go home feeling relieved and happy.

My last day in Miami

Tags

independence, letting go, Miami, postaday2013, university

Today was a marathon session of orientation for both the baby girl and I, albeit separately and we definitely got oriented, my head feels stuffed full of information, hopefully tonight while I sleep my little brain cells will be able to sort out all the good from the fluff. While my baby girl was being oriented, I like using the word slightly nonsensically, I took the time to walk around the campus using the trajectory that she will be using, going from the Cox Science building to the Dooley building and then straight to the Mahoney Dining hall and then the adjacent Residence hall just to have an idea of what her day will entail.

I then spent some time admiring all of the lizards that are everywhere, I love lizards. I also walked along the pathways going from fountain to fountain all the while dreading the moment that I would have to say good-bye. On a positive note, before the baby girl went off with her group to another session, I caught up with her at the ballroom where they had been directed to initially, I saw her in the middle of a group of girls and I saw her twinkling eyes. That was all that I needed to see to feel much better at last.

I was getting nervous before that sight because I didn’t want to leave her with nervous and anxious eyes, and seeing those twinkles in her hazel eyes lifted the huge load off my shoulders and my heart. When we said good bye, we hugged and hugged. She shed a tear or two while I said silly things to make her laugh and and be light-hearted. The silly things were also to help me keep the tears from squeezing out of my eyes, I wanted my baby girl to go to bed feeling happy and excited, not sad.

Miami, we’re back

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hotel, Miami, move in, postaday2013, university

We are back in Miami and this time the baby girl will be staying and I will be going home alone, sniff, sniff. It is going to be so hard to get on the plane alone, leaving her here, multiple states away, no longer only just an hour and a half away east towards Boston. Our baby girl will be fine I know, I have so much confidence in her, this is all about me, my worrying, my mothering and wanting to keep the baby girl in the nest a while longer. This is when my reliance on taking deep breaths comes into play, she will be fine, deep breath, she will be happy, deep breath, she will feel at home, deep breath.

That is all that every parent wants for their child, to go forth and be confident, be independent and try new things. However we all worry about the things that are beyond our control, the X factors that you can’t predict. This is when the leap of faith and a test of our parental lessons are in the balance, and you wait and see how well you did and more often than not you will be very happily surprised.

I am looking forward to see how these next few days unfold, I know that we will have fun together and everything will be fine.

Bringing back baby

Tags

car, College, empty nest, postaday2013, road trip, spring break, university, vacation

Today, sniff, sniff, we had to drive our baby girl back to her school. The spring break vacation was over and it was time to get her back to her studies. I had just gotten used to having my baby girl back home and it was already time to drive her away from home back to her college domain. Tomorrow is sure going to be quiet. Our baby girl was excited to get back to school and I am grateful for that. It would be awful if she was miserable or feeling overwhelmed. Instead she went back with a huge smile on her face, ready to continue with her academic work and enthusiastic about her future. I can tell you that when your child feels that way, it lightens your heart and your spirit and you sleep much better at night, knowing that since your child is in a good place emotionally and mentally, they will tend to make much better choices in their daily lives or at least you hope. I have faith in my baby girl, she spends a nice amount of time on self-reflection and she keeps me in her orbit, to which I feel lucky to be included.

I miss the little baby girl, but I really love seeing the young lady that she is growing into and spending time listening to her dream and plan her future career and adventures is exciting. Seeing a child grow up is almost like having two lives, you are as invested in their happiness as you are in your own. You celebrate their triumphs even more than you would your own, when they hurt, it hurts you just as deeply. The connection between parent and child is incredible in all of its complexity and depth. An amazing gift.

Parenting is challenging

Tags

children, parenting, postaday2013, relationships, university

No matter how long you do it for, parenting never ceases to present new challenges. When children leave the nest, you would think that the worrying would decrease to minimal levels. Until a phone call comes from a certain child who is away at school and unhappiness is on the other end of the telephone. The unhappiness is important to the said child but in the grand scheme of things, it does not register on a red alert which I am so very happy to report but still unhappiness is not an optimal thing for a college student, repercussions can multiply and then amplify the initial unhappiness, hence the worrying. I am grateful that said child calls often and I get to monitor the pulse of the emotional well-being of my baby. I am not worried about my baby in terms of her academics, I worry that certain acquaintances in her circle are sucking her emotional vitality away from her. So while I’m listening, I’m thinking that all she wants and needs is someone to listen, not offer advice. It was a little too hard to refrain from giving a little advice which I quickly stopped doing after she let me know that she isn’t me. I didn’t say it but what I really wanted to do was slap every single person responsible for making my baby girl unhappy.

I know that she will be fine but I am still not happy with those people. It is a part of life to learn how to deal with all types of people but usually you don’t have to live in such close quarters all the time. Experiences such as these do promote strength of character or so I have been told, but as a parent your first instinct is to want to shield your baby from these sort of experiences and when they are little you are allowed. Only when they are big do you get tortured with the fact that you have been relegated to observational status. Don’t care too much for the observational status when my baby is sad but I need to learn to accept it. She will be fine; she is bright, smart, strong, resilient and kind.