Long distance relationships are easy when it is based on letter writing and self editing. The use of the written word leaves a lot of wriggle room for how much can be said, the overall tone of the letter and the balance between all out sharing and omission. It has been awhile since my hubby has been on the road and I had forgotten how sensitive he is to his absence from here. I need to relearn the self editing process and keep things to myself. He cannot handle too much information, he can only function on a need to know basis. I made the mistake of unloading a stressful episode on him, forgetting that he is not me, and it was ill received. We ended up in a quarrel with the ever mature way of ending the phone call by him saying don’t call me and me replying fine. Great on both ends.
Part of me is angry because, I shared what happened to me with him not because I expected him to do anything about it but because it happened to me and I wanted to get it off my chest. His issue with me telling him is that he is 4000 miles away and it gave him stress and that is not fair to him. The crazy thing is that it wasn’t a big deal, I was pulled over by a state trooper for no reason whatsoever, it is the second time it happened and I was annoyed. After he got upset about the stress that I had given him, he was equally upset that I hadn’t adequately dealt with the bank. So I was batting a big fat zero. What I need to remember whenever I speak to him next, is to just keep my mouth shut and ask him questions about his day and keep my day out of it. I’ll simply tell all of you how my day went and leave it at that. Much easier and less painful.